Defamer: Kate Moss

Meat Lover Jessica Simpson Becomes Latest Celebrity To Face Snarky Wrath Of PETA

Molly Friedman — Tue, 17 Jun 2008 16:05:00 PDT

No blog, talking head or alcoholic British songbird can compete with PETA when it comes to snark. For decades, the animal lovers have verbally beheaded countless starlets for their fur and snakeskin accessories, but only recently have their targets bitten back. After seeing a recent photo of plumper-than-usual Jessica Simpson sporting one of those so-last-season message t-shirts reading “Real Girls Eat Meat,” we wondered how many of her peers have boldly set themselves up for one of PETA’s trademark white powder massacres. Having called Nicole Richie “an incredible shrinking woman with the heart to match,” advising Ashley Olsen that “wearing fur does add 20 pounds, but if [she] wants to fill out her frame, we suggest using a fork instead,” and telling Lindsay Lohan “there's no road to recovery for the foxes who are anally electrocuted so that you can look skanky,” has PETA inspired any other starlets to publicly react just as vehemently? We take a look at the ongoing battles after the jump.

After making PETA's 2005 Worst Dressed List and earning particularly mean reason from the group's trademark bag of bitchy tricks, ("If she keeps on wearing fur and eating at Carl's Jr., she'll be back on the list next year as Star Jones."), Paris allegedly sat through animal torture videos from China and promised to stop wearing fur. As a reward, PETA removed the "heirhead" from next year's list. Christina Ricci followed a similar path after making the 2006 list, sitting through a Martha Stewart expose (shudder) on how mean it is to hurt the fuzzy wuzzies, and PETA obliged by removing her from the list as well. And the always crafty Lindsay Lohan managed to put a stop to her inclusion on the 06 list before its release date by assuring the PETA prez she was working on "weeding out" fur from her wardrobe. Too bad last month's whole fur bandit shenanigans didn't exactly make our favorite chic lesbian look like a woman who keeps her word.

As for those stars who've decided to fight back against all the haters at PETA, Ashley and Mary Kate Olsen have made the Worst Dressed List more than a few times, but quietly made their reactions known by including tons of animal fur in their clothing collection last year. As for the queen of Best Dressed Lists (just not PETA's), fur lover extraordinaire Kate Moss has continued to sport everything from beaver to rabbit to mink to who knows what kind of lizard skin onesies after hours despite PETA's threats and cutting remarks ("Nothing completes the transition from supermodel to super tramp like a fur coat.")

Bonus: Britney Spears, endless black hole of lovely surprises, was cut from PETA's poll earlier this year because, according to a PETA spokesperson, she "needed a break." While it doesn't quite fully endear us to the red paint sabotage army, we can't help but think that it's a positive gesture.

[Photo Credit: X17, Bauer-Griffin]

Emma Watson Selling Soul For Cash, Controversy And Curse-Laden World Of Chanel's Fallen Stars

Molly Friedman — Mon, 16 Jun 2008 12:35:00 PDT

As excited as we are for borderline troublemaker Emma Watson and her rumored new deal to become the “face of Chanel” at 18, the $6 million contract comes with a curse or two. The French cosmetics giant has been airbrushing celebrity visages in ad campaigns for years, but its most recent short-term star partnerships haven’t always ended amicably, nor have they resulted in the kind of chaste and glossy reputation sources predict for Watson. Though a friend insists that “She’s not going to end up like these other Hollywood train wrecks, she just isn’t...No one is going to be saying, ‘I never wanted to see Hermione in that light,’” we took a look back at her quilted bag-carrying predecessors to shine a light on the kind of controversy this same wallet-fattening gig has earned its celebrity reps in the past.

Despite having represented Chanel's Coco Mademoiselle fragrance in addition to appearing in campaign after campaign as the brand's moody red-lipped rep since 2001, Kate Moss and her contract were kicked to the curb months after the supermodel's famed cocaine tape hit the tabloids in April 2005. Though Keira Knightley was loudly announced as Moss's replacement, Kate very quietly usurped a bit of Keira's thunder by re-entering the house of French glamour after her comeback hit its stride a year later. But by far the most publicized partnership between Chanel and star occurred when Nicole Kidman appeared in a short film directed by Baz Luhrmann to promote her new role as iconic fragrance Chanel No. 5's porcelain-faced embodiment.

But all the hullabaloo and fanfare came to a stop when Kidman became pregnant, irking Chanel and causing them to pull yet another switcheroo, hiring fellow French star Audrey Tautou to take over the reign. As Tautou's star remains lukewarm, industry insiders began buzzing with the surprising and off-kilter news that none other than heiress to the grunge throne, Frances Bean Cobain, would begin appearing front and center as Chanel's new ad girl. But Cobain's upward momentum towards the fashion world's limelight never materialized, and having perfected the art of sudden blows, Knightley is now rumored to be ousted as Watson prepares for her year or so of acclaim and glossy ads. We just hope Emma manages to keep the apparently very short attention spans of the Chanel bigwigs, or at the very least, has the stamina to turn her inevitable drug- and Britney-flashing downfall into a glittery comeback like Kate.

'POTTER' STAR WATSON GETS BIG PAYDAY [MSNBC]

Not Even Public Display Of Baldness Can Remove Kate Moss From Chic Pedestal

Molly Friedman — Fri, 13 Jun 2008 12:20:00 PDT

By some rare stroke of British luck, original waif Kate Moss was born with a very superheroine-esque capability: no matter what she does, from the beautiful to the grotesque to the illegal, the act will somehow wind up looking chic. Remember, this is the girl who bent over a dirty mirror to snort crusty Peruvian paint thinner in hellaciously grungy Pete Doherty’s drug den on a grainy, shaky camera and managed to make the whole thing appear "alluring" (Slate), and “glamorous” (CNN.com). Today’s case in point? Leaving the afterparty for her new fragrance launch in Berlin the other night, the supermodel’s outwardly voluminous blonde glossy hair began to fall out. Right on the red carpet. For all to see. Pictures, and why the mishap will soon be the “thing to do” on every red carpet in the future, after the jump.

As the Daily Mail reports, Moss was on her way back to her hotel after a night of celebrating Velvet Hour, her new fragrance which presumably smells like a floral mix of baby powder, laxatives and regret, as one silky hair extension broke free and landed (in a very photo spread-worthy fashion, actually) right on the red carpet outside the party. Though Moss didn't appear to care, distracted by bouts of nose-swiping instead, a paparazzo took it upon himself to grab the fake golden locks and we expect to see the flawless token on auction sites any second. Should this have happened to say, Britney Spears or Paris Hilton last night, the hair piece would maybe rack up a decent hundred bucks or so, but this is Cocaine Kate! There might even be a few snortable crystals in the threads! We predict the bidding to begin at a few thousand euros at the very least. And in a late-night state of self-degradation, Britney may even find herself the lucky winner.

[Photo credits: WENN]

KATE MOSS LOSES HER HAIR (EXTENSIONS)...ON THE RED CARPET [Daily Mail]

The Secret To Looking As 'Fit' As Gwyneth And Beyonce? Starve Yourself Silly, Of Course!

Molly Friedman — Thu, 12 Jun 2008 13:25:00 PDT

Coming in at number two right after Lesbian Chic on the list of 2008's hottest celebrity trends is the slim fast phenomenon sweeping the pounds off Catherine Zeta-Jones’ ass, Britney Spears’ arms, and pretty much every inch of co-starvation partners Katie Holmes and Victoria Beckham. But of course, when Queen of Female Mind Control Oprah Winfrey puts in her two cents on the dieting front, every housewife and Oprah wannabe begins taking dutiful notes on how exactly she’ll take a few pounds off this time around. And according to a piece in the NY Daily News, Detox is the word. From Gwyneth and Beyonce to Ralph Fiennes and Vince Vaughn, these four varieties of temporary "cleansing" yourself are the current diet du jour. And of course, the question is: does it work? And more importantly, is giving up our nightly vino and succumbing to regular colonics worth looking like a lollipop head? Which celebrities are using which method, and visual evidence of their results, if any, after the jump.

Martha's Vineyard Detox Diet: Followers include ridiculously skin-and-bones supe Gisele Bundchen, weight loss master Robin Quivers and the muscular Madonna. The 21-day detox promises devotees to shed 21 pounds in that many days "by subsisting on live juices, enzymes - and regular colonics." Fun!

The Master Cleanser: Reportedly what Beyonce used in order to nab her Dreamgirls role, Vince Vaughn allegedly follows the lemon juice liquid diet, and Jared Leto shed his Chapter 27 weight by drinking the "water mixed with lemon, maple syrup and cayenne pepper" cocktail as well. Yum!

Dr. Joshi's Holistic Detox: Fans include the clavicle-flashing Gwyneth Paltrow, original waif Kate Moss and currently slim Ralph Fiennes. The main focus is avoiding acidic and toxic foods, but the downside hardly sounds worth it, and sort of explains Kate's moody expressions in photo after photo: "Users report headaches, stomach pains, nausea and fatigue." Even more fun!

[Photo credits: Getty, Wireimage, FilmMagic]

CELEB DETOX DIETS MAY PROVE HARD TO SWALLOW [NYDN]

Is Kate Moss' Newest Boy Toy Just Pete Doherty 2.0?

Molly Friedman — Wed, 19 Mar 2008 14:51:12 PDT

Sad news for Kate Moss-aholics out there: the controversially hot-or-not former supermodel is engaged to another dirty-looking rocker, Jamie Hince, guitarist for The Kills. Judging by her former paramours, like Johnny Depp, Lemonheads frontman Evan Dando and our all-time favorite kitten-loving junkie, Pete Doherty, it's no surprise that W's April cover girl has fallen for another rough-around-the-edges bad boy. But must he look like such an eerie cross-breed of Pete and Amy Winehouse's Romeo, Blake Fielder-Civil? And more importantly, why does Kate insist on slobbering all over his neck? More pictures of the two new lovebirds, and what the notoriously vicious British tabloids have deemed Kate's vampire-like behavior, after the jump.

News broke of Moss and Hince's engagement in October, and while a date has yet to be set, the lovebirds have been spotted in How Dare You! paparazzi photos recently, as Moss feigns shock and disgust upon spotting shutterbugs capturing her unbridled love on camera. First, the two were caught dining outdoors in full view of passersby...

And then paps saw the (shocked and annoyed!) pair out and about on the streets of London at night, seemingly in the middle of an argument. We suspect Jamie was taunting Kate for wearing that same damn fur coat she used to swish around with during her Petey days...

And finally, the "vampire" photo in question, which, in our humble and not so modest opinion, looks like an innocent slip of the tongue on what most women's magazines will have you know is an "erotic zone" or some such rubbish like that. But can Kate's impressive tongue, drama-filled street fights and erratic choice in boyfriends really result in a fairy tale come true this time? We'll be keeping our ears peeled in between practicing Kate's oral maneuver on various aghast randos this week:

[Photo Credits: Splash News]

KATE MOSS SUPERMODEL JAMIE HINCE COULD BE VAMPIRES [The Sun]

Celebrity Knees Under Attack By British Press!

Molly Friedman — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 12:59:34 PST

There's no two ways about it, Americans love obsessing over celebrity nip slips, vadge flashes and sex tapes (even if it is Gene Simmons...shudder). But the British tabs, being as posh as they are, have taken a more conservative approach to body part fascination: knees. While photos of the bony joints attached to Kate Moss, Eva Longoria, Jennifer Lopez and Courteney Cox may not tighten your trousers, the names they've come up with for each gal's wheely kneelies give the NY Post a run for its money in the hed-writing department. Photos of The Sun's picks for Worst Knees, along with their snappy yet barely decipherable titles ("Eva Longoria's Tunnock's Teacakes Kneecaps"!), after the jump.

"Kate's pins reminded me of one of my favourite snacks - the Jaffa Cake."

"If [Courteney] sees these pix she'll no doubt be rushing off to the same doctor as DEMI MOORE to make hers the bee's knees.

"Judging by Eva's skinny knees she needs to put on weight. Tunnock's, send her a truckload of tea cakes."

"Heavily-pregnant JENNIFER LOPEZ proves she is a bigger star than ever as she heads for a party with her hubby — and her knobbly knees."

SOPHIE'S GOT TOBLERONE KNEES [The Sun]

Eva Mendes For CK Fragrances: A Floral Blend of Gin, 'Cane and Boozy Burps?

mollyf — Fri, 01 Feb 2008 16:36:16 PST

Calvin Klein has always been a fan of drugged-up stars, but this morning's announcement that the designer picked Eva Mendes to star in his Spring `09 fragrance campaign makes him look less like a "fan," and more like a druggie Obsessive (uh, get it?). Klein, of course, is not only the man behind those heroin chic denim ads featuring (ahem!) Kate Moss in the 90s, but he's also been in and out of the revolving rehab door once or twice himself. While TMZ reports that the designer's decision to feature Eva in ads for the spring spreads came hours before her announcement, we're starting to wonder if Klein isn't just some pill-popping, powder-snorting design wiz like the rest of 'em.

Considering the fact that Moss's fashion career grew more successful than it ever had been post CoKateGate, we suspect Klein knows exactly what he's doing by casting an otherwise-unimpressive actress in a starring role, just as she happens to hit the skids. As you'll recall, within days of Moss's 2005 snort scandal, she was dropped from million-dollar deals with H&M, Burberry and Chanel. But within two years, she'd scored countless new contracts. Burberry even reneged and offered her her former contract back, and TopShop jumped on the comeback bandwagon last year by giving her the chance to design her own (sold-out-within-minutes) collection.

But back to Mendes: the actress, though beyond gorgeous, is no Kate Moss when it comes to iconic figures in fashion. Which leads us to groan and bring up a little lady named LiLo, whose deal with Jill Stuart was perhaps the most short-lived in campaign history: weeks after shooting ads for Stuart in Tokyo, Lindz had her first run-in with the law (and a tree). We're not betting types, and sure, we hope Mendes/Klein turns into a Moss-like rise from the dead, but the prospect of Mendes putting on Cokepants by accident seems slightly more likely than Mendes becoming the new Cindy Crawford, no?

EVA MENDES: CALVIN KLEIN'S LATEST OBSESSION [TMZ]

Is It Just Us?

Mark Graham — Mon, 21 Jan 2008 15:13:06 PST

· Or does the new sketch of the man suspected of snatching young Madeline McCann look a lot like Killer Bob? Through the darkness of future past, the magician longs to see, one chants out between two worlds ...fire, walk with me!
· A previously unknown complication of pregnancy has kept J. Lo from being J. Lo of late. At least according to those louts in the British press, who have been taking her to task for her "bulging, crinkled knees."
· Kate Moss started her 35th year off with a bang. A 4-way bang, that is.
· For all of you out there who think that Dakota Fanning is over the hill, enjoy this not-at-all-creepy post by Just Jared featuring twenty of the most popular Elle Fanning pictures available anywhere online! We're fawning over Fanning, too! Then again, not so much.
· And, with that, we're out of here. We leave you to spend the next 18 hours or so reviewing The Thighmaster's wildly entertaining list of his 2007 "Thighs Wide Movies." So best, indeed.

Ang Lee's Moss-On-Theron Action Merely Wishful Thinking

Seth — Tue, 28 Feb 2006 15:54:11 PST

Brokeback Mountain producer and frequent Ang Lee collaborator James Schamus set the record straight with USA Today over the recent rumors that the director's next project would be a biopic on the life of singer Dusty Springfield starring Charlize Theron, with Kate Moss as her lesbian lover. It seems the entire thing was a media-concocted fabrication:

"It came from a couple bites on the Internet that collided," says James Schamus, Brokeback producer and longtime Lee collaborator. "It showed up on one of these gossip sites, and Ang and I were like, 'Huh? What?' I'm a Dusty Springfield fan but it's all completely fabricated."

And with one brief and bemused denial, the lip-smacking fantasies of millions of eager straight men ready for their equivalent of Brokeback's seminal Jake-taking scene (perhaps Kate could have played a recording studio after-hours cleaning woman who just happens to wander in while Theron's Dusty is rehearsing, and the two quickly surrender to the forbidden she-goodies at their disposal...but we digress) are snuffed like a gay cowboy's cigarette after a satisfying night of fly-fishing.

Lee quashes 'Dusty' rumors [The O-Factor]
Previously: Ang Lee Wins Back Straight Men With HLA [Defamer]

Ang Lee Wins Back Straight Men With HLA

Seth — Tue, 21 Feb 2006 09:41:15 PST

Having ensured himself a lasting place in the Gay Man's Hall of Fame with Brokeback Mountain, director Ang Lee has made a canny choice for his next project: He'll stick to gay love stories, but win back the hearts of the straight guy population with some sweet girl-on-girl action starring two of the hottest chicks on the planet:

"Brokeback Mountain" director Ang Lee is said to be thinking about Kate Moss for a lesbian role in his forthcoming move about singer Dusty Springfield. Moss would play a socialite lover of Springfield, due to be played by Charlize Theron.

It's a brilliant, almost-everyone-wins scenario: Gay men will show up in droves to see a masterful cinematic retelling of the life of one of their most beloved pop icons, while straight men and lesbians will delight at the deliberately paced, artfully lit Theron-Moss sandwich scenes. Only the straight female demo is underserved, though Lee is said to have plans to remedy that with his still unchosen follow-up project, with the director reportedly leaning favorably towards the as-yet-untitled "Matthew McConaughey as Incorrigible Womanizer Who Secretly Has Heart of Gold RomCom Project."

Side Dish (Third item) [NY Daily News]

Lindsay Lohan Finally Winds Up On The Pole

Mark — Thu, 12 Jan 2006 08:14:48 PST

Lindsay Lohan is a true master of her craft. A lesser ~~attention whore~~ tabloid victim would've called it a night after showing up at a bar with last year's most celebrated cokehead, Kate Moss, and scrawling a nasty message equating rival Scarlett Johansson with a part of the female anatomy (or, in perhaps a worse sin, pandering to Brit BFF Moss by appropriating some slang). But not our Lindsay, who made her Sharpie wall-poetry merely the first act of her evening. Says Page Six:

Lohan, Moss and a couple of female friends swanned into the Upper East Side mammary mecca at about 2:45 a.m. and headed straight for the legendary Champagne Room, where the giggly group ordered round after round of vodka shots, raspberry Kamikazes and beer.

Their table was immediately swarmed by strippers and Lohan and Moss enjoyed numerous lap dances. But the fun really started when Moss jumped on the stage nearest the main bar and began grinding against a pole, much to the delight of hundreds of red-blooded banker types.

"Kate was going wild," a witness told us. "After a few songs, Lindsay jumped on stage with her. They were swinging on the pole with their arms around each other's waists, kissing each other, caressing each other, just acting like strippers. The crowd was cheering them on the whole time. They didn't take off any clothes, but it was very hot." [...]

"They were both running in and out of the ladies' room a lot," [paparazzo] Edstrom recalled. "I saw when it was just Lindsay dancing solo and Kate was yelling, 'You're a pro, Lindsay! You should do this for a living!'

Credit Moss with being a great friend; it's not easy to sound sweetly positive about the seemingly inevitable downward trajectory of your starlet pal's career. But this news does seem to present another opportunity for Lohan's brilliant publicist, Leslie Sloane Zelnick, to shine. We expect her to dismiss out of hand the easy, hacky "no comment" or outright denial options, and instead weave a fantastic tale about how during Lohan's troublingly recent hospital stay in Miami, she received a massive, mistaken transfusion of stripper blood, and clearly can't be held accountable for her actions while her body adjusts.

KATE, LINDSAY BUMP-&-GRIND [NY Post]
Lindsay Lohan Writes Scarlett A Sharpie Love Note [Defamer]

Lindsay Lohan Writes Scarlett A Sharpie Love Note

Mark — Wed, 11 Jan 2006 13:37:23 PST

No matter how hard we try, we can't quite connect the dots on a a joke that begins "Kate Moss and Lindsay Lohan walk into a bar" and finishes up with one of the two rubbing her nose and instructing the bartender to "put it on her bill." (One of them probably needs to be carrying a duck, but whatever.) Anyway, the facts of Gawker's real-life tale of troubled dynamic duo Lohan and Moss, on the loose together in NYC last night, is much better than anything we could come up with:

We hear that last night at about 11:30, none other than Lindsay Lohan and Kate Moss sauntered into the Dark Room during the Tarts of Pleasure DJ set. Apparently the BFFs were looking for a venue where they wouldn’t be noticed, so Last Year’s Favorite Blow Bar seemed an appropriate choice for two “recovered” drug users. The ladies stayed there for the remainder of the night (presumably because they love hanging out with folks like Carlos D and My Chemical Romance); over the course of the evening, Lohan expressed her fondness for Gang of Four while Moss laid low and acted model-like.

Here’s where it gets more interesting: While in the bathroom, Lohan allegedly asked if anyone had a Sharpie. A fellow patron actually happened to have one and handed it over to Lohan, who then used it to scrawl “Scarlett is a cunt” on the wall. Well done, Cap’n Discreet.

Whatever Lohan's beef with Scarlett (professional competition? some lingering Leto-related nastiness?), at least she was smart enough to scrawl her trash-talk on a bathroom wall, instead of going with the more legally problematic route of having her publicist plant a fake story about her rival in Page Six.

UPDATE: Gawker now has photographic evidence from the incident and the full text of the wall-note: "Scarlett is a bloody cunt / L / Peace and love / [illegible] / fucker."

Kate Moss and Lindsay Lohan’s Dark Room Adventure [Gawker]

Short Ends: Famous Person Falls Down!

Mark — Tue, 22 Nov 2005 17:40:06 PST

· Kate Moss jumps around to music, topless, then falls down. 'Nuff said.
· Blame boredom, blame out-of-control teenage hormones, blame a Kim Catrall marathon on TNT. But whatever you do, don't blame the mannequin. It's merely a victim.
· Feature Films for Families is trying to improve Hollywood's lax morality, one annoying telemarketing call at a time.
· 50 Cent encourages parents to use his ultraviolent video game as a teaching tool. With schools all over the country dropping essential "Vigilante Execution of Drug Dealers" coursework from the curriculum in favor of useless sports and fine arts programs, he's got a point.
· Desperate Housewives' gay-seeming, budding serial-killer pharmacist writes a prescription—for creepiness.

The Kate Moss Cocaine Video: Now With 300 Percent More Blow

Mark — Fri, 07 Oct 2005 14:31:39 PDT

Kate Moss can't catch a break. The beleaguered model has endured a hasty trip to rehab, the loss of lucrative modeling contracts, and even the unbidden support of Sharon Stone. But now, the release of another shocking cocaine video threatens to commence yet another trying cycle of public humiliation and psychic pain. Good thing it looks like she's been working out—she's going to need all her strength to survive this latest trial.

Kate Moss Cocaine Video [Liquid Generation]
Previously: Kate Moss Cocaine Video Hits The Internets [Defamer]

Kate Has A Friend In Sharon

Mark — Tue, 04 Oct 2005 09:14:10 PDT

In this, her darkest hour, rehabbing supermodel Kate Moss knows that even when it seems that the whole world has turned on her and pretended that it doesn't enjoy a good line of blow or five for an afternoon pick-me-up, Sharon Stone has her back:

Actress Sharon Stone defended Kate Moss on Tuesday and implicitly criticized companies who were parting with the British supermodel after a newspaper alleged Moss had snorted cocaine. [...]
"I'd like to say as for Kate Moss, I understand that she has apologized and is changing her life. And I think that that is the most important thing that's happened," Stone, the star of sultry thriller "Basic Instinct", said in Paris.

"I think that we have to be aware that people are allowed to make mistakes in their life," she told a news conference at which she was being presented as the new face to promote Christian Dior's Capture Totale anti-ageing line. [..]

"If you are in here and haven't made a mistake, I'd like to meet you because I've been waiting for Jesus — and today would be the day," Stone said to loud laughter.

As if on cue, Jesus Himself appeared among the assembled press, stepped forward, and hurled a small rock, striking Stone in the temple. Said He, "Sharon, you know I love you and everything, but please, for the love of My Father, shut the fuck up."

Sharon Stone defends Moss after cocaine scandal [Reuters]
Previously: Kate Moss Cocaine Video Hits The Internets [Defamer]

Kate Moss Cocaine Video Hits The Internets

Mark — Mon, 03 Oct 2005 10:03:39 PDT

Since there's an outside possibility that you won't have a chance to watch a model blow some rails until you go out for lunch, we dutifully direct you to the video of Kate Moss's infamous hoovering of some unsuspecting lines of booger sugar. The "exclusivo" video is in Italian, which serves to restore some of the exotic allure that coke lost for you once you moved to L.A. and saw your first punch bowl full of the stuff at a party.

Kate Moss is screwed [WWTDD]

Scientologists To Save Cocaine Kate

Mark — Thu, 22 Sep 2005 10:50:15 PDT

After discovering that Steven Spielberg was too strong of mind to be wooed by their Ritalin-hating wiles, Scientologists are moving on to the weakest wounded bird of the celebrity sphere, quietly offering to save model Kate Moss from her powdery master:

“Scientology has become quite proactive in reaching out to people,” says the source. “Kate is a woman who needs help and Scientology feels that they can steer her in the right direction.”
Specifically, says the source, Scientologists will be urging Moss to undergo treatment with Narconon, a drug treatment program with strong links to Scientology. Greg LaClaire, head of the Scientology’s Celebrity Center declined comment, telling the Scoop, “We don’t talk about the private lives of anyone.”

Look—we're going to be up front about this. There is absolutely no way we can discuss Scientology-assisted rehab without making the Tom Cruise Personally—Personally! joke. So here goes: With the chance to ~~recruit~~ help such a red-hot celebrity, Tom Cruise is going to go on hiatus from shooting Mission: Impossible: 3 and personally—personally! hold Moss' Hoover-strength nostrils closed and force-feed her vitamins and sandwiches until she's completely stepped off drugs.

God, we feel so dirty. But the good kind of dirty.

Scientology reaches out to Kate Moss [MSNBC]
Previously: Cruise And Spielberg: End Of The Affair? [Defamer]