VH1 Rolls The Dice With New Unknown Actress Reality Show, But Does The 'I Wanna Be A Big Stah!' Format Work Anymore?

The Paris Hilton Workout

· Paris Hilton goes to the WOW Report's gym, where her workout is monitored by both bloggers and sneaky paps: "Then, across the way, I notice a guy sitting down on the Pectoralis Major machine dressed in jeans and black shoes. He pretends to pump some iron. This is suspicious as everyone knows the Pectoralis Major machine has been out of commission for the last six months. Suddenly, the dude pulls out a telephoto lens camera from his backpack and starts snapping away at Paris while she's mid bench-press! A couple of gays shriek and point at the photographer, and within a few minutes he is escorted from the gym by a staff member."
· Here's a list of things you can do in the same amount of time Nicole Richie spent in jail.
· Anchorwoman almost definitely would have lasted longer than one episode if Steven Spielberg's name was attached to it.
· It's truly the end of an era: Jenna Jameson undergoes a sure-to-be controversial de-bazooming procedure.

· The moviegoing public's hunger for threequels has proven so lucrative that studio executives have taken to using three hundred-dollar bills at a time to wipe themselves in celebration of their incredible run of summer success. [Variety]
· Will Hollywood's mad rush to get projects into the production pipeline before a possible strike result in movies which are shittier than normal? Answer: Yup, almost certainly. [THR]
· Warner Bros. is planning a live-action, big-screen version of the Hanna-Barbera cartoon Johnny Quest. Not that anyone asked us, but there's no way this gets made without Timberlake attached to star, right? [Variety]
· Just 2 million dedicated moviemaking fans tune in to Fox's absurdly low-rated—but still alive and kicking!—On The Lot on Tuesday night, as the show quickly approaches its goal of having a single viewer for each dollar in the competition's $1 million top prize. [THR]
· Imagine visionary Brian Grazer will superproduce the tentatively titled series The FBI for Fox, a project that should finally satisfy Grazer's burning desire to do "a thing about the CIA or the ATF or NSA or whichever one of those places with the cool initials will let me sleep on the floor of their offices for a few months so I can soak up the atmosphere. And maybe shoot a gun." [Variety]

We're not entirely sure what keeps us watching On the Lot, Fox's ratings-challenged attempt at discovering Hollywood's Next Great Tranny-Victim Director. We doubt it's the contestants' short films, however, but rather the constant tension between host Adrianna Costa's plunging necklines and her rack's ability to remain securely in place. One Defamer operative on the Westside, meanwhile, recently discovered just how badly the show's finalists want our votes:

I came home from another crushing day at work to find this plea taped to the mailbox outside my Santa Monica apartment. I also saw another one at the local grocery store, only this time it was addressed to all of SM.

'On The Lot' Still Casting, Just In Case Jerry O'Connell's Unavailable This Week

We Could Never Begrudge Ricky Gervais An Easy Payday

· Ricky Gervais will star in Early Retirement, a pitch Warner Bros. bought about a a workoholic who—get ready for it—quits his job to spend more time with his family, a decision we're sure has uproariously hilarious, unforeseen consequences. [Variety]
· Hollywood StrikeWatch: The AMPTP reaches a deal with the Teamsters and several craft unions, freeing them up to dedicate all of their attention to convincing the Writers Guild that the internet is just a silly fad that will never generate reliable revenues. [THR]
· Paramount becomes the fifth member of this year's "billion dollar club," and is already busy designing the trades ad touting itself as the Highest Grossing Non-Sony/Warner Bros./Disney/Fox Studio of 2007. [Variety]
· Amazingly, Fox's On the Lot has still not been canceled, though its viewership is now limited almost exclusively to the friends and family members of the remaining contestants. It's a real shame, because Penny Marshall's largely incomprehensible stint as guest judge last night was really something to see. [THR]
· Where Are They Now? Former Children's-Birthday-Wrecking, Alcoholic Party of Five Clowns Edition: Scott "Bailey" Wolf signs a talent holding deal with ABC. [Variety]

Obama Campaign Gets Hot Oprah Injection

· While it seemed that Steven Spielberg had ended the race for the Democratic presidential nomination in throwing his support behind Hillary Clinton, an undeterred Barack Obama has gone above the Hollywood kingmaker's head by getting Oprah Winfrey, the beneficent daytime TV deity Herself, to host a fundraiser for him at her Montecito compound. An expected $14 billion will be raised for the Obama campaign in a single night when Winfrey commands the heavens to open up and shower bundles of hundred-dollar bills upon her chosen candidate. [Variety]
· In the short term, the stockpiling of projects in anticipation of a multi-union strike may increase the number of entertainment industry jobs, but overall, the threat of a walkout could cause an employment slowdown whether or not the guilds and producers usher in the End of Hollywood Days with a prolonged work stoppage. [THR]
· CBS sets its fall schedule, but will hold risky musical drama Viva Laughlin until October 21 in order to buy more time to figure out how the hell to market the show to inevitably confused audiences. [Variety]
· Despite having his TV show let go to make more room on the schedule for caveman-related programming, George Lopez doesn't seem to be having too much trouble finding movie work. [THR]
· Beleaguered Fox/Spielberg collaboration On The Lot now only being watched by accident. [Variety]

Other Network Jobs That Might One Day Be Available To New Fox Hire Kevin Reilly

· ABC's Steve McPherson on Monday's announcement that pal Kevin Reilly is headed to Fox: "I hear when they fire me, he's going to come run this place," McPherson said. He then continued, his face rapidly draining of blood, "Haha, I'm just kidding guys, my job is completely safe. Guys? Guys? We're fixing Cavemen, I told you that yesterday!" [Variety]
· Every basic cable Christmas special should find a place for former 90210 star Shannen Doherty, whose very presence announces the arrival of a magical Yuletide spirit. [THR]
· Finally: Desperately Seeking Susan: The Musical! Featuring, bizarrely, music from Deborah Harry and Blondie's back catalog. Will the story still play with "Heart of Glass" instead of "Into the Groove"? Developing... [Variety]
· Fox's beleaguered On The Lot, airing a night earlier than usual because of tonight's All Star game, comes in fourth place in its timeslot against only rerun competition. Even we didn't watch it last night, and it's our job to monitor its death-throes. [THR]
· Speaking of Fox, the renegade network plans to use its Emmy awards telecast to launch its fall season, a week before Nielsen's officially decreed start date for the ratings race they will largely concede until the next season of Idol premieres. [Variety]
· Universal buys the rights to Vanity Fair article about Barbaro, Gone Like the Wind, for triple-threat-hack Peter Berg to direct. Somewhere, our buddy Will at Deadspin faints dead away with delight. [Variety]