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Gossip
Snoop Dogg: Lost In Space
Seriously, we'll print anything today. New Year's Eve is like a national holiday from our senses. And since all the agents and producers are busy demanding better rooms while checking into Phuket resorts (you know they love a good deal), they'll never know all the fun they missed. An equally-bored tipster sends this in:I own a record store and I just had a completely stoned customer walk up to my counter and say the following to me: "Ya know that rich British guy, Branson or something? Well he has a spaceship and last night Snoop Dogg went up in it and now NASA can't get them down. Dude, Snoop is lost like for fucking-ever." Since it is a slow news day, I figured this insane little tid-bit deserved some rumor-mongering.Breaking! Crazy man wanders Los Angeles record stores!
Business
· Paris Hilton takes a faceplant on the social slopes of Gstaad. [Page Six]
· Fuckin' Debbie Reynolds, man. She's the meanest chick in town, as everyone knows—almost as vindictive as Shirley Maclaine and that cruel, cruel Julia Roberts. Now she's backed out of a mall display of Hollywood memorabilia and she's getting sued, the little witch. [AP]
· Anna Nicole Smith's lawyer vows vengeance; will lil' Anna ever get her rightful $88 million? [CNN]
Gossip Roundup: Graham King Shakes His Bankroll
· Aviator investor and foreign rights salesman Graham King is the man with the big money—no, the other one, the guy that isn't afraid of Harvey Weinstein. [LAT]· Paris Hilton takes a faceplant on the social slopes of Gstaad. [Page Six]
· Fuckin' Debbie Reynolds, man. She's the meanest chick in town, as everyone knows—almost as vindictive as Shirley Maclaine and that cruel, cruel Julia Roberts. Now she's backed out of a mall display of Hollywood memorabilia and she's getting sued, the little witch. [AP]
· Anna Nicole Smith's lawyer vows vengeance; will lil' Anna ever get her rightful $88 million? [CNN]
Culture
Coca-Cola's 'Tidal Wave' Fanta Campaign: Dead In The Water
I've always been one to look for the silver lining, but it's taken a few days to find the good news in the tsunami. Finally, the answer comes: those pre-preview Fanta commercials which seemingly play in every theater before every single film, featuring four lithe, prancing she-whores. These four wriggling, thirst-quenching, multi-culti vixens are getting the bloody hell booed out of them in the theaters now, as they embarrassingly endorse a "tidal wave of flavor." D'oh! There are rumors of an anti-Fanta campaign being mounted, and we imagine Coca-Cola execs are crapping themselves as they rush to pull the ads. More »
Movies
Best Picture Race: Hype vs. Big Money vs. No Money
A little chart in which top-ranked Best Picture Oscar contenders are cross-referenced with most recent "stock" sale price at Intrade, cross-referenced by number of screens on which the film will play on December 31st, 2004 (as per Box Office Mojo). The number in parentheses after the movie title represents Entertainment Weekly writer Dave Karger's ranking for inclusion in the Best Picture race, because he's both pretty and stupid, just the way we like our men. His number 5 choice, Eternal Sunshine, didn't make our list because we'll eat Dave's sweaty shirt if it makes the Academy's. More »
Movies
'Dawn of the Dead' r0x0rs: Cancel the Oscars
We were just crunching some Academy Awards prediction numbers, but little did we know, our research is irrelevant. According to a mega fanboy, it's all about Dawn of the Dead:This movie stomps so much ass that they have to import colons from other countries to meet the demand. [...] So here I am watching the movie and it's pretty badass, but then out of nowhere *WHAM*. Tits on the screen. Like finding an unexpected $20 in the wash, the director throws in some jugs for good measure.I actually couldn't agree more. I watched this movie over Thanksgiving with my mom and she was all Best Zombie Movie Ever. (I'm totally serious, she was.)
TV
Favorite TV Personalites of 2004
America loves its lesbians, blacks, and those funny crazy Jews—at least, from safely behind the glass of a television. Third-year-running first-place queen Oprah, plus Jon Stewart, Ellen Degeneres, and Bill Cosby are all up in the Harris annual poll of most popular TV personalities. More »
Business
Trade Round-Up: Rupert Murdoch Kills Kittens
Just kidding. But seriously, if you're gonna do some devious business crap or deviant personal insanity, do it today. No one's paying attention. Here's all we could scavenge from the desiccated trades today: More »
Culture
Tom Cruise Gets Merit Badge In Brainwashery
In case your subscription to International Scientology News—or Cult News— has lapsed, it's been reported that the December issue has a doozy of a photo of Tom Cruise getting heavy-medalled by David Miscavige, Chairman of the Board of the Religious Technology Center. If I'd known there would be pretty diamond-studded jewelry involved when I took that personality test on Hollywood Boulevard, I'd be all up in that Scientology spaceship by now.
- Tom Cruise, Scientology's Earnest Dupe [Dave Touretzky]
- Scientology awards Tom Cruise a gold diamond encrusted Freedom Medal of Valor [Cult News]
Gossip
These Are All People Who Have Died (In 2004)
If you're famous, please please don't die in the next 48 hours, because the news folk have already put together their lists of everyone who died this year. Just hold on until New Year's Day. More »
Business
Christmas At Viacom, The Little Cartel That Could
There's something about the end-of-year corporate memo that's always just a litttttle bit creepy—especially if you're Viacom. Basically, let us summarize this year's mashnote from Viacom honcho Sumner Redstone, which we assume was largely ghost-written by Viacom chief media expansionist and serial semi-monogamist Les Moonves as he cackled and covered himself in the blood of lesser, warmer-blooded television executives: More »
Movies
· Restored Eisenstein classic The Battleship Potemkin to be screened at the 2005 Berlin International Film Festival. Cinema students from around the world will marvel at the "Odessa Steps" sequence, then promptly flee the theatre before being bored senseless. [THR]
· 267 films are eligible for Oscars this year, leaving Academy members with a lot to ponder. Fear not: crystal meth suppliers are at the ready! [THR]
· Jay Mohr will host Sundance Channel festival wrap up show, Festival Dailies. [Variety,
sub. req'd.]
· Despite the nation's unabated interest in elections, disasters, and Petersons, cable news ratings were down in 2004. [Variety, sub. req'd.]
· Acting unions likely to end up with same deal as writers and directors, but with more flair and intrigue along the way. [Variety, sub. req'd.]
Trade Round-Up: A Union Is A Union
· Blockbuster Video pressures rival Hollywood Video to sell, saying it's in the best interest of their shareholders. But is it in our best interest? Don't we deserve, nay, require, two video store chains to go between so as to constantly dodge our late fees? [THR]· Restored Eisenstein classic The Battleship Potemkin to be screened at the 2005 Berlin International Film Festival. Cinema students from around the world will marvel at the "Odessa Steps" sequence, then promptly flee the theatre before being bored senseless. [THR]
· 267 films are eligible for Oscars this year, leaving Academy members with a lot to ponder. Fear not: crystal meth suppliers are at the ready! [THR]
· Jay Mohr will host Sundance Channel festival wrap up show, Festival Dailies. [Variety,
sub. req'd.]
· Despite the nation's unabated interest in elections, disasters, and Petersons, cable news ratings were down in 2004. [Variety, sub. req'd.]
· Acting unions likely to end up with same deal as writers and directors, but with more flair and intrigue along the way. [Variety, sub. req'd.]
Business
'Phantom' Sucks; Stupid Audiences Shocked, Betrayed
In the January 3rd, 2005, issue of the New Yorker, Anthony Lane rips Andrew Lloyd Webber and Joel Schumacher's Phantom of the Opera into tiny, bloody chunks, comparing the flick to a "special-edition remix of a Duran Duran video." It's definitely the feel-good review of 2005 already. More »
Movies
Intrade: Betting On Bening At the Oscars
Intrade, the "stock exchange" which handles everything from weather to elections, has put up its major category Academy Awards odds. The money is heavy on Aviator and Scorsese; Million Dollar Baby is riding its extreme buzz pretty strongly though, and pulling along Eastwood right behind Scorsese. They're totally buying the Jamie Foxx hype, too, which makes us want to give Paul Giamatti a greasy, self-hating hug. And insanely, they've got Leo DiCaprio in third place for Best Actor. Whatever. More »
Gossip
Jerry Orbach, RIP
Jerry Orbach, the badass Lennie Briscoe of Law and Order, is reportedly dead at the age of 69. More »
Diary
Celebrities Damp; World Media Mourns
Exactly how does one write an AP headline like "Celebrities Among Victims of Tsunami" and sleep at night? More »
Culture
Megan's Law: Producers On Edge
Amy Alkon points us in the direction of California's new Megan's Law website—and it couldn't BE more fun! It's like Friendster for the molester set! And you just know the new sex offender registry has caused a panic on the lots right now; somewhere, as we speak, a producer is eyeing an auditioning teen... More »
Gossip
· Lifetime movie of the week catches President Bush's eye, prompts him to pass the Video Voyeurism Protection Act. The act makes secretly taping people a federal crime, unless your name is Cheney. Perhaps more important though, is the revelation that the President is watching Lifetime (Television for Women (and Homos)), and can be communicated to through said outlet. Look out for the network's new series Get us the Fuck Out of Iraq, this spring. [THR]
· Oscar Ballots were sent out this weekend, and in the holiday mail rush, are sure to end up unfilled, on Hollywood's mantle, next to Brian Grazer's children. [THR]
· It's official: everyone got an iPod for Christmas, except you. (And except for those of you who got Sirius radios, to whom we say: ha ha!) [THR]
Trade Round-Up: Adam Baldwin Is A Man's Man
· Adam Baldwin joins cast of Fox drama The Inside as a "tough, seasoned FBI agent, a man's man with 25 years on the job." [THR]· Lifetime movie of the week catches President Bush's eye, prompts him to pass the Video Voyeurism Protection Act. The act makes secretly taping people a federal crime, unless your name is Cheney. Perhaps more important though, is the revelation that the President is watching Lifetime (Television for Women (and Homos)), and can be communicated to through said outlet. Look out for the network's new series Get us the Fuck Out of Iraq, this spring. [THR]
· Oscar Ballots were sent out this weekend, and in the holiday mail rush, are sure to end up unfilled, on Hollywood's mantle, next to Brian Grazer's children. [THR]
· It's official: everyone got an iPod for Christmas, except you. (And except for those of you who got Sirius radios, to whom we say: ha ha!) [THR]
